More Notes on Recovery

Well, I have eaten solid food for 2 of 3 meals today, which is a good sign that I'm recovering. But, I still feel incredibly drained. I foolishly tried to go into work on Monday, but realized my folly after about 2 hours. I went to my follow-up doctor's appointment, then came home and went to bed. I have not accomplished much more than that since then. You should see my laundry pile!

I probably would have been well enough to go to work for at least part of the day today, but guess what? Savannah now has caught the dreaded gomboo... She started the night off early by sleepwalking, which I've noticed she usually does if she doesn't feel well or if she's stressed. I think that last night was a combination of both. Then, about 2:30 a.m. she woke me up to tell me that her tummy hurt. And it was off to the races from there - the poor thing. It is sooo hard to watch your little ones being sick like that, especially knowing there's nothing you can do but let nature take its course. I did manage, however, to try and smuggle some potassium into her system! At one point in the day I smooshed one of my over-the-counter potassium pills into a powder and then stirred it into her apple sauce. She only took a few bites, but I felt better knowing she at least had a little more than she did earlier! I have a feeling I am going to become the neighborhood potassium pusher.

Anyway, I'm going to take a much-needed break from dwelling on our illness and post some pictures of the good sights we saw on our drive Friday, BEFORE the real adventure began. :)

Savannah, with Bear Lake in the background. It always amazes me what a gorgeous blue it is!

The second campsite: I like this one even better than their usual camp, but I understand it was a leveling nightmare. Seems to me (not being the leveler) that it would be worth it!

For some reason, this photo reminds me of pictures I've seen of Lewis and Clark, after they finally made it to the Pacific. Annie, the fearless explorer.

Daddy/Daughter reunion. She sure missed her dad!

Braden, practicing his aerobics moves. I don't know WHERE he gets all his energy. All the other photos I tried to take of him came out blurry because he was constantly moving too fast. I do have one that looks amazingly similar to the Bigfoot photos you always see. It could explain the smell of his socks!

Look! There were still some trees with leaves left on them...

Lessons Learned

Okay, I now have a new definition of what exactly qualifies as a “bad day.” As you know from my previous post, I had a really hard day at work on Thursday, followed by a really long night with the kids, school events, etc. Yeah… whine, whine, whine. The bright spot in all of it was that I was taking Friday off to drive up to Bear Lake to help drag the 4-wheelers home for Tom and Braden.

Well, yesterday, that’s what I did. I let Savannah stay home from school so that she could ride up with me, and we headed out about 10:30 a.m., after going to Bray’s school for his first Parent-Teachers conference of the year. Afterwards, we hit the open road. It’s always a beautiful drive through Logan Canyon, and I was happy to see that there still were some trees with leaves left on them, so I got at least a taste of the beautiful fall colors. We found their new campsite with no problem (they’d moved the trailer lower down in case it snowed that night) and then proceeded up to their old campsite to load up the ATV’s on the trailer. Where it SNOWED on us. In OCTOBER. Not even mid-October! I have NEVER seen snow this early before. Anyway…

Coming back down the road, I started feeling slightly nauseated, but nothing horrible. With the Meniere’s, I spend more time than I’d like to admit feeling nauseous, so I didn’t pay much attention. By the time that we got home at 4:30 p.m., I was REALLY not feeling well. I excused myself to bed, feeling guilty because Tom didn’t really want to cook dinner any more than I did. Nonetheless, he went to the store to get the makings of spaghetti. After laying in bed for a short time, I started in with the most horrible case of vomiting and diarrhea that I’ve ever had. I called Tom at the store and begged him to not come home without medicine in hand., which he did.

In the meantime, I decided to take a bath, thinking that it would help me feel a little better. While in the bath, I started feeling horrible again, so I got out, vomited some more, and then started feeling really weird. My whole body started tingling (I’m told I must have hyperventilated, which I’ve never done before), and my whole body was going numb. I knew I was in trouble, so I managed to get to the bedroom door to call for Tom to come and help me. In the meantime, my arms and hands started curling in on themselves, as did my feet. While Tom and Savannah tried to call 9-1-1 because I couldn’t even walk at that point, Savannah kept telling Tom that “Mommy’s feet are shrinking.” It was VERY scary. I have never had anything like it before in my life, and hope to never go through it again.

Sooo… we had a houseful of paramedics, sheriff’s, etc. It seemed like forever before the paramedics arrived, and it turns out that they actually had a tire blow-out on them on their way here, so had to call for another ambulance. They started me on an IV to get me rehydrated, which took forever. Turns out I have “shallow” veins, and they kept having to stick me and stick me before they finally got one. THAT HURT LIKE HELL because my muscles in my hands and arms were so tensed up and turned in on themselves. It literally felt like my muscle would shatter like glass if anyone even barely touched them. By the time they got me to the hospital my blood pressure had returned almost to normal (it was 160/120 the first time they took it) and after more fluids in my system my hands and arms finally relaxed back to normal. After drawing blood, they discovered that through the vomiting, I had “totally depleted” my potassium reserves, and that was probably what caused the symptoms I had so they gave me an IV bag of potassium too… Wow! Who knew that potassium could cause such problems?

All in all, it was a pretty horrible night. They kept me until about 12:30 this morning, when they finally let me go. We soon discovered that in the rush and excitement from the house, I did not have any shoes or a coat to wear home (and it was dang cold).

Anyhoo, I will no longer whine about my day at work Thursday. As I’ve always known (and I should have known better), IT CAN ALWAYS GET WORSE. I’m still not feeling wonderful, and my arms and hands are extremely achy today, but it’s still WAY better than it was. A special thanks to everyone who stepped up to help with tracking down the kids (the boys were at the corn maze while all this was going on) and for my Pastor and his wife who came and made me laugh and then prayed with me. It's times like this that just bring home to me how blessed I am with the friends and family I have...

To hell and back

Luckily, most days are not as awful, from start to finish, as today was.

I won't go much into my day at work, but suffice it to say that just because one works surrounded by Ph.D's who are arguably very bright people, that doesn't always mean that they have common sense. In fact, I would propose that the higher the level of education, the LESS common sense they actually have. Anyhoo, it was a TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, NO-GOOD, VERY BAD DAY. And LONNNGGG... Did I mention long?

Then, after work was finally over, I got to rush home to grab Savannah and Evan, run back to Savannah's school, because, YIPPEEE! Tonight was the school carnival! My favorite day of the year!! Except it was a nice, warm 50-degrees with a windchill factor of I would guess -90. It was DANG cold, but Savannah REALLY wanted to ride the ponies, one of the few events that they kept outside. We waited in a long line until I developed hypothermia, then I put my foot down and declared "There will be NO pony rides this day!" Mean mama, I know, but I was just too darn cold to care.

Inside we went, but OH MY. You wouldn't think that they could pack that many people into one little hallway. You literally could not get through the crush of bodies to even see what cheesy, OOPS- I mean fun, games they had set up. The best part? If you could make it to the cafeteria where there was actually room to breathe, they had Teacher Karaoke! Very LOUD teacher karaoke, I might add. My life is now complete... :)

I guess the good part of the day was the fact that I had worked so long at work that we only were able to spend an hour at the carnival. As soon as it was 7:00 on the dot, we were off again, rushing to church for Savannah's Christmas play practice. Normally this wouldn't be so bad, but after the day I've had, all I wanted was to come home and crawl into bed.

On another note, Tom called me earlier today to let me know that he and Bray are coming home tomorrow instead of Sunday (crap, now I have to cook again!). I guess that the weather's been absolutely miserable all week, and they haven't seen a single elk (usually they see them, just the wrong kind). The forecast is calling for more rain tomorrow night, and then, yippeee! Snow on Saturday. Excuse me while I weep... As our pastor pointed out in church last Sunday, it has only been 9 1/2 weeks since the snow on top of the Wellsville mountains was gone, and last Sunday there it was again. Can I just say that I am NOT ready for winter again?

I am taking tomorrow off of work so that I can drive up to their camping spot and help haul their ATV's home. I think a drive up the canyon to see the beautiful fall colors will do me a world of good (provided all the leaves haven't blown off with today's wind), and getting a break from work will be even better! I feel a little guilty leaving my co-worker there alone all day to fend off the fiends (sorry Becky), but I'm sure I'll get over it come 6:30 a.m. tomorrow when my alarm DOESN"T go off!

Anyway, I'm home now, have my shoes kicked off, and am not moving off this comfortable couch cushion until somebody forces me from it! Thanks for letting me vent... :)

No Boys Allowed

The first week in October is our family's favorite week of the year, for different but similar reasons. You see, Saturday was the first day of the elk hunting season, so Tom and Braden are off being manly-men and living in the woods for the next 10 days. Tom eagerly looks forward to this time each year as his time to just relax and get away from it all. In all the years that he's done this particular hunt, he has NEVER gotten an elk. I have tried in vain to convince him to take the time, make the trip, but leave the guns and the money he spends on elk tags behind! He might as well get the enjoyment out of it, but save at least SOME money in the process... ;-)

Anyway, Savannah and I always look at this time as our special "mommy-daughter" time. We go window-shopping, see a movie, and then our favorite, dinner at the Olive Garden at least one night (we are both addicted to their Zuppa Toscana soup - just one more sodium-laden thing that I can't have any more *** excuse me while I stifle a cry *** Okay, I've got it back together now). We eat whatever we want for dinner, which at least one night during that week will consist of a bowl of sugar-laden cereal. To put it mildly, it's like a vacation for all of us. Tom and the boys get away from work and school and, although I still have to work, I get a vacation from cooking the 3-course meals I usually serve up each night. Hallelujah!

Last year, Evan was grounded because of his performance at school, so he had to miss out on the annual trip. Being the (overly) nice mom that I am, I still allowed him to come with Savannah and me on our special dinner out. You have NEVER heard such sniveling and whining as I had to endure from him. He hated the wait, hated the decor, hated the salad dressing, hated the options on the menu, blah blah blah blah blah... Needless to say, it was NOT a good time for any of us. I do believe that may be the closest he's come to death, and he's had many times that he's pushed me to the verge (I am a big believer in Bill Cosby's quote on parenthood: "I brought you into this world; I CAN take you out."). But I digress.

This year, Evan wisely decided by himself to stay home so that he won't be buried alive by homework after a week away from school. At least that's the story he's telling. Personally I think it's got more to do with his fear of telephone withdrawals. He and his girlfriend (Annie the girl, not to be confused with Annie the dog) are constantly on the phone, and that is not an exaggeration. The other night he was on the phone and the computer that's located in our bedroom, while I was relaxing and reading a book in my bed. I kid you not: they spent 30 minutes just sitting there, with him occasionally singing along with songs he liked that were playing on the radio. The worst part is, I remember doing the same type of thing at his age. How could I have been so ridiculous?!!! How can they?!!! I am soooooo glad to have gotten past the teenage stage of my life, and it's brought me a whole new level of respect for my parents that they let me live through it too...

While it's been nice (so far) having him home, Savannah is feeling sad because we're not getting our "alone" time. My suggestion to her: tomorrow we dress him up in a nice shirt and skirt, and it can be "JUST US GIRLS." I was rewarded with her adorable giggle, and the request for a wig as well. I think that's the least he can do. :)

Ahhh... I love October!

Snips and Snails...

Boys are so...so... I really don't know WHAT they are, other than sometimes pure joy and very often pure frustration!

When I had the boys, I was so excited to have them close together (20 months apart) so that they would always be each others' "best friend." Obviously I hadn't had two boys 20 months apart before! My brother and I were 8 years apart, so I had woefully misguided yet idyllic visions in my head about how fun it would be to have a close companion at every turn. I longed for a sister, and even dressed my brother up and did his hair in ribbons so that I could pretend. Lucky for me I was so much older, so he couldn't resist! I didn't realize that someday they would go crazy from having companionship at every turn.

It started at such a young age too! When they were little, my grandma (who was totally blind) watched them for me while I worked. For those of you who never knew her, she was absolutely amazing. She raised four of her own children and then had a direct hand in raising all of us grandchildren. However, Evan figured out early on that "grandma's eyes are broken," so he could be a total hellion so long as he did it quietly, and then blame it on Braden. For several months I would pick the boys up from Grandma's and hear about how horrible Bray had been (at age 2), how he'd gotten into the fridge and dumped out ketchup or mustard on the floor, how he'd take all the books out of the bookcase, etc. etc. Finally, near Halloween that year, grandma told me how Braden had gotten into her Halloween candy and dumped it everywhere. Finally, the proverbial lightbulb came on over my head: there was NO WAY that Braden could have gotten up to the cupboard that the candy was placed in, even had he been able to push a heavy chair over there. The poor little guy had taken the blame for months, when it had been Evan all along. I still feel awful for that one...

The next summer, he got his revenge. The boys had one of those big, yellow Tonka dumptrucks that I swear every little boy who has ever lived has had, and I was watching them play in the yard through the kitchen window while I did the dishes. Evan had again been pulling his "big brother" act, taking every toy that Braden played with. Braden would just shrug, and go find something else to play with. Eventually he'd had it, and I watched as he casually got up, went over to where Evan was playing, picked up the dumptruck and conked him over the head with it. No tears, no fighting, just "problem solved." You could almost see the thought in his head: "You want it big boy, you got it!!!"

Thus, the constant wrestling began, which is still what drives me craziest. It starts out as good fun, but it ALWAYS gets out of hand. But if I try to stop them when they first start, I get the same "Oh mom... we're just kidding around." Anyway, I'm sure that some day they really will be best friends, and I am starting to see glimpses of that now.

Watching them play football in the yard tonight was another of those moments that gives me hope that they will actually be friends, even after they leave home. It's so fun to watch them and see how far they've come, and I love listening to the sound and timbre of their soon-to-be grownup voices. I think the fact that Evan will be 16 this month is hitting me hard (and making me feel REALLY old!). I know it's trite, but it seems like just yesterday that they were playing with those trucks and fighting over who got what bunk in their room...

** Sigh ** Now if only they could pull this off for more than 30 minutes before it turns into another brawl... ;-)

I'm not asking for much, really...

All I want is one good night’s sleep!

Those of you who know me know about my current struggle with Meniere’s disease. Although the worst symptom is the vertigo and it’s wonderful close friend, extreme nausea, I am currently only having a bout of that about once every 2-3 weeks or so. Not fun, but at least the diet seems to be lessening their frequency and occasionally even the intensity.

One of the more irritating symptoms, at least for me, is the tinnitus. I notice it infrequently during the day, mostly because work is always so busy and there’s always lots of noise around me, so I don’t focus on it as much. Night times, however, are another story... It doesn’t matter how tired I am at night when I finally collapse into bed, as soon as I lay down, my ears kick into overdrive, screeching with wild abandon. The exact sound is hard to describe: the closest I can come is to the annoying tone that plays on TV before a severe weather alert, but in a much higher pitch that goes on forever and ever...

Just as an aside: Wouldn’t it be nice if God would use this obnoxious little system that emergency planners have created to give us information about upcoming storms in our own life?! I could stand it more if I knew there was useful information forthcoming.

BLEEP... BLEEP...BLEEP... Long screech, then a deep mechanized voice:

"The following message is being brought to you tonight by God. SEVERE WARNING:
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT, purchase the rug you won’t quit coveting at Home Depot. It doesn’t matter if it is on sale. It doesn’t matter if it goes "perfectly" with your new decor. You don’t need it. Just a hint: You MAY want to save every penny for the fuel pump that plans to die on you next week. I'm just sayin.'"

BLEEP...BLEEP...BLEEP...

ANYWAY, back to the topic at hand. Because of the screeching every night, I am having a terrible time getting to sleep. I have tried drinking a cup of sleepy-time tea before bed, but even though I love the taste, it doesn’t knock me out, plus drinking it at night and being on diuretics is not a good combination! ‘Nuf said there...

I’ve tried taking melatonin, which I’ve heard is all-natural, but it leaves me feeling way too tired the next morning, regardless of how small a dose I take.

I’ve tried something by the company that makes Tylenol PM (Pharmacist Preferred!) called "Simply Sleep," which deceptively promised me that I’d "fall asleep fast; wake up refreshed" in its lovely lettering. It MUST be true if it’s in italics AND bold!! Needless to say, I have spent many moments between midnight and 2:00 a.m. composing hate letters in my head to the advertisers of this product who duped me into buying the 100-capsule bottle.

Eventually I drop off from sheer exhaustion, but the alarm clock doesn’t seem to care that I’ve only had 4 ½ hours of sleep... Rise and shine, you poor schnook!!! By the time 5:00 p.m. on Friday rolls around, I am barely able to lift my head up off my desk. I LIVE for Saturday mornings when I can sleep in. That knowledge is what keeps me going. But last night was one of THOSE nights.

I somehow managed to keep myself awake long enough to pick the boys up from the homecoming football game. They really have no idea what a sacrifice they are requiring from me to still be functioning well enough to drive at 9:30 p.m. on a Friday night! Then Braden hadn’t eaten, so he HAD to go to McDonald’s for dinner, so we waited forever with the teeming hordes there.

Finally home, and off to bed for me! I’m so tired, I just KNOW I’ll fall right to sleep this time. And you know, I was almost there until Tom came to bed at 11:00, and the nightly snore-fest began. If I flounce around and "accidentally" aim elbows in just the right spot, he’ll usually roll over and it goes down in volume to a more tolerable level. I quit looking at the clock around midnight, so I must have gone to sleep shortly after that. Then, at 2:30 a.m., Stitch, our sweet-natured but slightly neurotic black lab, started barking. He never barks, so I decided I’d better get up and check to make sure things were okay. Everything seemed to be in order, other than Savannah had moved out to the couch in the living room and was sound asleep there. So, back to bed for me. Unfortunately, Tom was once again in full snore mode, and no amount of flops, jabs, or even kicks seemed to help. I finally gave up and went to fold myself into the loveseat in the "sitting area" of our room. No good... I could still hear the snuffles and snorts just as clearly. I can’t go into the living room, because Savannah’s already claimed the couch. WAIT! I’ll go into her room...

Oh, but FIRST I think I’ll step square into a fresh pile of doggy diarrhea left in the hallway by Annie sometime during the night. YES! That’ll set the right tone for a good night’s sleep! Then, when I recoil and leap in horror at that squishy, gooey feeling between my toes, I’ll make sure to land with my clean foot in ANOTHER pile! After cleaning up the mess, both on me and in the hall, I staggered into Savannah’s room. I now understand why she has been asking for a new bed. That is THE most uncomfortable mattress I believe I’ve ever laid upon. Back to the loveseat... nope, still too noisy there. By this time, it was almost 5:00 a.m.

In desperation, I flipped on the bedroom light (Tom didn’t even flinch, nor I may add, subside in his deep breathing routine), found the combination to his highly guarded footlocker, dug out the keys to the camp trailer, dragged my blankie and pillow out across the driveway, and went to bed in quiet solitude to sleep until noon.

At 8:00 a.m. Savannah came looking for me, and now here I am again...

Goodnight all; wish me luck!

Teenagers drive me nuts

So, both of my boys have struggled ever since they got into middle school. I shouldn't say they've "struggled," because that implies that they are actually attempting to do their work and just having a hard time.

I cannot tell you how many times that they have been grounded, lost ALL privileges, had to listen to mom nag endlessly, etc. etc. They'll get caught up for a week, and then revert to old habits. Here's the thing: neither one of them are stupid. They're both bright, and have personality to spare.

I just don't understand why you would DO the work and then not turn it in. Or turn it in eventually (after you've listened to one of mom's endless lectures) only to get half credit, which, by the way, still gives you an F. My favorite is the grade slips. Most teachers in their schools send home grade slips to let parents know how their child is doing, and they give a a very generous number of points to the student if they turn it back in, enough to actually raise them at least half a grade. No matter how miserably my boys' are doing, they ALWAYS show me their grade slips, I dutifully sign them, and then THEY NEVER TURN THEM IN, thus dropping their grade even further.

Why? Why? Why? (Insert sound of me repeatedly thunking my head against the wall).

Anyway, there's no lesson or valuable moral in today's post. I just needed somewhere to vent where people might actually listen and care.